The number one thing parents ask me when talking about potty training is ‘Do you think my child is ready?’
This topic can be a little tricky. How can a child be ready when they don’t know what to do? Toddlers are always ready to learn, that is what their whole life is about right now. I think the more appropriate questions are: Is your child capable and are you ready to teach?
Teaching your child how to use the toilet instead of eliminating in their diaper is a whole world shift for your toddler. This is a habit they have had their entire life and you are asking them to break it. You need to be ready to guide them, explain to them, be calm and patient. So my best advice is don’t start potty training when you are stressed at work, moving, on a time crunch, or fighting with your spouse. And if you don’t have another option, take a breath and coach your child on the exhale.
Now if you are ready to teach your toddler this new life skill, a good thing to ponder is the capability of your child. One good test is can they dress and undress themselves. This does not need to be perfect, they may still need a little help to straighten their pants or snap a button. If they haven’t explored this on their own yet, encourage it by playing dress up and asking them to pull their pants up after a diaper change.
Another couple of things to look for as you ponder when to start potty training is are they able to communicate their wants and needs. This will be crucial because they will need to be able to tell you when the race to the potty is necessary!
Don’t forget to have conversations about using the toilet with your toddler. A great time to do this is while you are in the bathroom or changing their diaper. Introduce them to the concept that big girls and boys don’t use diapers. Harness their desire to be like their mom, dad, older sibling/cousin, grandparents, etc! Pride is the biggest motivator in potty training. Let them know how excited you will be when you get rid of the diapers.
If you need a general rule of thumb for potty training age, between 18-24 months is a bit of a sweet spot. Most toddlers are emotionally and physically capable at that time but it is before the push back of a two year old occurs. I do recommend potty training prior to 3 yrs. Biology starts to work against you after that as the bladder starts to lose elasticity. Also if pre-school is in the future, many require students to be potty trained and you don’t want to stress train weeks prior to school starting!
